“You’re the man, dude!” Aaron congratulates him as the two exchange a fist bump. “What about you, dude? How many times did you cum?” the older stud now asks his cousin. “It was more than 50, dude…probably like 55, 56,” Aaron replies. “I’m fucking proud of you, dude!” J.J. congratulates the younger stud; both of them have slightly underestimated their number of orgasms for last week, but with their tools spurting so many times, it was easy to lose count. The two are swapping stories of their sexual exploits from last week when they notice a big red SUV approaching from up the road; it slows down and its turn signal starts to blink as it nears them. The vehicle pulls into the driveway, parks at the very end and the driver’s door opens. Danielle gets out and starts walking up the driveway towards the two bare chested studs. Her pace is unhurried and she twirls her keys in her hand, putting her usual tantalizing bounce into every step. The two studs look at each other with anticipation;. Or stand. After aneternity, I picked up the phone. I was so agitated and scared that Ididn't notice the ten voicemails. Or the texts. Or the Twitter alerts.I called Monica and she picked up. Not her assistant. Her. "Where areyou?" Rehearsal," I wheezed. "What's wrong? Did something happen to my mum?My dad? Is everything OK?"All she said was, "the shit has hit the fan, Allie." Monica! Why? What the hell is going on? Are my parents OK? TELLME!"She paused. "They are fine, Allie. It's not that. I'm guessing youhaven't looked at Twitter." You know I'm in rehearsals. I haven't looked since early thismorning." I checked my voice mail log. Chloe. My mum. My dad. Chloeagain. Tom. My mum. My dad. And three unidentified numbers. "OK,Monica, what's going on? Why is everyone calling me?"She sighed, "Check Twitter." I had turned off notifications, except forprivate messages. #Jallie had thankfully slowed down to be replaced byvolleys of inanity and hate between people.
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